Comes the Dawn
by Shift
Summary: Falling in Love can the hardest thing some people do, even when it's easy ... a Beast Boy and Raven Story


Disclaimer: I don't own teen titans, if I did the series would still be running strong.

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Hey there, I'll keep this short and sweet, I just had a really cute idea for a fluffy BB-Rae story and here is the first instalment. I hope you enjoy!

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_The heart has its reasons that reason knows nothing of. Blaise Pascal_

_Love is my religion - I could die for it. John Keats_

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Raven sat in the entertainment room with a book laying casually across her lap, Cyborg and Beast Boy on the other end screaming and cheering and really just making a nuisance of themselves while playing one game or another, Raven never kept track.

Today she wasn't even trying to pay attention, not to them, not to their game, not even the book laying open and unread against her legs. Todayshe had other things on her mind, more important things to worry and wonder about then the every-day life of the Tower.

Trigon had only been defeated less then a week earlier, but to Raven it felt like she had been free of his influence for years. And it frightened her. Her entire life up until this point had been with the knowledge of what she was born to do, of what her father was and how he could use her, of what hertomorrow would be, andher next day and the day after that and after that, on and on until her young life was taken from her.

An endless stream of meditation and improvement and repression was all she'd ever known. She couldn't allow herself to think of anything else, she couldn't allow herself hope or friends.

But she did, she hadn't known it when the group was first formed, but they did become her friends, all of them, and she loved them for it. That friendship grew into Hope before very long, but she could even accept that so long as she never forgot the inevitability of her existence.

But then the worst happened, her nightmares came to pass, Trigon rose and that friendship she was so afraid of, the trust and the love and the Hope they gave her that she thought she should have never allowed herself to feel. They saved her, and she saved the world only by drawing on their strength.

And then the end ended and she had found herself trembling in the darkness of her room.

Terrified.

Because Trigon was gone.

Because she no longer knew who she was or what she should be doing.

Her entire life she'd known her future, she fought it but it was always there, in everything she did, every moment of sorrow or happiness, every time they ate pizza, or fought a villain. Every moment she felt her heart beat, and her lungs take in air, every time she thought or read or felt anything. That shadow was there at the back of her mind poisoning her against herself.

Now it was gone, and her life suddenly seemed to lack direction, to lack purpose. She was allowed to live however she wanted, and she had no idea how to even begin.

It wasn't the freedom that frightened her.

It was the not knowing what to do with it.

Or how to live with it.

She didn't know what it meant to live, and it was killing her.

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Beast Boy scowled at Cyborg while the large half man half machine did a victory dance while shouting insults as his green compatriot and high fiving himself.

Beast Boy stopped listening after only a few seconds though, and hadn't even really been paying attention to the game for the past five minutes, which would explain why he lost at agame he was usually so good at.

He hadn't been paying attention because he'd glanced over and saw Raven with her book, not an unusual sight to say the least, but she wasn't reading it, and she wasn't yelling at them for the noise they were making, she looked so sad.

He felt something tug him towards the girl, and he tried to think of a way to comfort her that wouldn't make her mad at him or uncomfortable. A near impossible feat to be sure, but he was Beast Boy, if any one could do it he could.

Besides, he already knew what was bothering her.

She had a habit of talking out loud when she was frustrated or upset, talking to her emotions he figured, and he had a habit of hiding himself somewhere nearby when she was frustrated or upset just in case he could help, not that she couldn't be read like a book by soemone who knew her and her moods well enough.

Beast Boy smiled when she looked up at him, sensing his eyes on her, she gave him a haflhearted one in return before rising and leaving the room. Beast Boy didn't watch her leave, he knew where she was going.

"I'm done today Dude, but I will so beat you tomorrow!"

Cyborg laughed as Beast Boy stood, "Yeah right grass stain, you just bring it on and we'll see whose king of the console!"

Beast Boy didn't respond he just let the door slide closed behind him with a gentle woosh sound and he made his way to the stairs. She always went to the roof when she wanted to think, when she was sad, he knew he would find her there, but she wouldn't be mediating. Beast Boy knew her well enough to know that, knew her on some instinctual level that went beyond the time they'd lived together and had been friends.

He pushed the door open, letting it creak every so slightly to let her know he was there, give her a chacne to either leave herself or tell him to leave, but she did neither.

"How did I know," she said in her quiet way without turning around from where she was sitting at the edge of the roof with one leg hanging over, "That you would come after me."

Beast Boy accepted the unasked invitation and sat down casually beside her, looking straight ahead just as she was to what could be seen of a full moon and a sky full of stars between scatterings of wispy clouds.

"Because I always come after you." He saidin reply, just as quiet, "when you want the help your afraid to ask for."

Violet eyes turned to him framed by violet hair, Beast Boy felt his heart catch in his throat but kept it from his face and voice.

"When my parents died," he began, "I felt the same way, I was suddenly all alone, nowhere to go, nothing I could do, not knowing what would happen to me next. It's the same for you really, except that I loved my parents, and they loved me. But it's the same feeling when they're suddenly gone. Every day, every hour of life before had something, some meaning, some purpose you needed to live up to," he gave her a significant look, "or live down. And then they're gone, and you suddenly have no purpose, and nothing to live fore." He turned away again, looking back out across the water, towards the shimmering lights of the city sleeping safely across, because of them, because of her. "But we're wrong, me and you. There's still purpose for us, there's still reasons to go on living."

Raven turned away, not saying anything for a long moment. "Love and Hate," she said at last, andthen another long pause, as if she'd changed her mind on what she wanted to say.

"Dance with me." Beast Boy said, sudden enough that Raven tilted her head and frowned at him in confusion.

"What?"

Beast Boy stood, extending a hand towards her. "Dance with me." He repeated, smiling gently. Raven stared at the offered hand, as if unable to comprehend what on earth she was suppose to do with it. Beast boy took initiative and pulled her to her feet. "You want to learn to dance don't you? I saw you watching Starfire and Robin when they danced at our party." A party, they both knew but didn't mention, that had been prompted by the defeat of Trigon. "You wanted to try, you wanted to know what it was like, I could see it in your eyes. But you hate feeling like your being watched, and you do have a reputation to uphold." He held his arms out wide and looked around, "We're the only ones here Raven, the only ones who'll know." He held his hand out towards her again, smiling outright. "Dance with me."

Raven felt a thrill down her spine but didn't know why, she felt an emotion in Beast Boy that wasn't there before, but she didn't know what it was. She'd had so much to be afraid of before she didn't know if she could break the habit now, she'd been bitter and distant for so long she didn't know if it was worth the effort to try and change.

But her hand reached out, of its own accord, placing itself into his which closed around it and pulled her a little closer. "There's no music." Was all she could think to say.

Beast Boy grinned, looking her straight in the eyes. "Will you sing or shall I?"

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Starfire floated unseen and unheard in the darkness not that far from where her friends danced on the roof, Beast Boy explaining the waltz as Raven tried to follow his lead. A soft sound floated up to her, so soft that were it not for her Tameranian hearing she doubted she would have been aware of it.

Raven was singing, humming really, not really comfortable or confident enough to let the sound grow louder or let the words form themselves upon her lips.

Not wanting to intrude the alien flew silently back to the ground and entered the tower through the front doors. She knew what Beast Boy felt for her friend, and knew that anything involving Raven usually required a certain amount of tact and carefulness lest the dark half-demon be frightened off by her own insecurities. Starfire had always found it strange that a young woman so strong and capable in battle would be so fragile in self. But she supposed, having the upbringing Raven did, that they were all quite fortunate Raven was as strong as she was self, strong enough to face her biggest demon and win. The smaller ones, Starfire was confident, would eventually sort themselves out as Raven flourished in her newly won freedom.

She had seen her friends mutual respect and attraction long before Beast Boy had become aware of it, and she knew Raven still had not. Maybe this though, was the beginning of the beginning for them, a chance to grow and learn with each other how to trust again, Terra and Malchior had left deep scars in both their hearts, but they had always been each others healers. This was best thing that could happen to them, and it was a mark in her favour that she could restrain herself from squealing when she first spotted them on the roof.

But as excited as she was Satrfire knew that there was one all important task she must accomplish to help her two friends help each other. She must keep Robin and Cyborg from finding out and from interrupting. Raven she knew would flee Beast Boys efforts if she thought it might in some way make her lesser in the eyes of her other friends, or a subject of ridicule. Beast Boy, she also knew, could be equally self conscious in any kind of social setting. Even one well meant but misguided word from the remaining two titans and Beast Boy and Raven would abandon each other.

As she entered the living room she found both of the boys there already.

"Hey Star," Robin greeted. "Have you seen the other two at all? I wanted to see if they wanted to go out for pizza with us."

"I have seen neither Friend Beast Boy nor Friend Raven." Starfire lied, knowing they would believe her. "But I had hoped you and I might partake of the training tonight instead of the Pizza, things have been quiet but there is no telling whena villain might appear or break out of prison." How could Robin resist? Her accent, and certain deficiencies in knowledge of the ways of earth people, often made her sound less intelligent, but she was quite smart, any of her teachers on Tameran would agree enthusiastically, but on Earth she found she could often use this to her advantage. Robin would not be able to pass up an opportunity to train, and she knew enough of how he felt for her to know that the idea of training with her alone would keep him from calling a team training session and thus continue seeking the other two.

"Have fun you two." Cyborg said, leaving his position on the couch and heading for the elevator. "I'm gonna go find BB and beat his butt at smash bro's some more."

"I saw him earlier," Starfire said in a deceptively calm voice. "He said something about the 'playing-of-tricks' and the T-car, vengeance for an early loss I believe were his words."

Cyborg froze, and because that was just something Beast Boy would do he did an abrupt about face and sprinted for the garage doors shouting "I _KNEW_ he was way too calm after I beat him!" the rest of the shouts were cut off as he rounded a corner and the door closed behind him.

Starfire smiled, that would keep Cyborg occupied in paranoid speculation for most of the night checking and re-checking every inch of his precious car. She knew her friends so well it was all too easy to keep them in the dark and on the right track at the same time. Then she turned back to Robin who looked half way between amused and confused. "Shall we train?" she asked sweetly, she even let him lead the way.

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Beast Boy felt himself directing her body in the right direction as they waltzed their way around the roof, she was a natural, he'd only had to explain it once and she seemed to instinctually become an expert. He thought briefly of a romance Starfire had made them watch her last turn with movie night, there had been ballroom dancing in it, the really fancy difficult looking kind.

He imagined Raven in one of those dresses, he imagined himself as her partner. Then dismissed it with a grin, he would never be capable of it, she might, he wouldn't.

So they danced, their heartbeats seeming to fall in line with the beat of the music in their heads, one-two-three-one-two-three, her soft humming rolling across his mind and senses like a sun shower in summer. He never would have expected her to have had such a nice singing voice. And her scent, like Lavender and Sandalwood, he could drown in it forever and die happy.

He wasn't sure when it had happened, lost as he was in sense and in thought, but at some point their waltz had slowed, the steps and movements forgotten, leaving the two young adults swaying slightly in each others arms.

She looked far away, as lost in through as he had been, and equally as unaware of their closeness. Beast Boy didn't smile as he looked down on her, this moment was too serious for it, too important. He searched her face, the subtle colours of her eyes, the curve of her lips, the proud tilt of her chin and the defiant waves in her hair. He searched himself too, his confused emotions towards this girl in his arms, he had been falling for her for a while now, though he was only willing to admit it to himself, and now, standing here dancing in secret and in shadows he tried to identify just how far that fall was.

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Raven listened while he explained to her, surprised at how simple it really way, the way she'd heard people speak of it before she had assumed it was some terribly difficult thing to waltz. It took only a few circles around the roof before she had well enough that her thoughts could drift away.

She had surprised herself when she had begun humming, accepting Beast Boy's invitation to be the music they danced too, though if she hadn't she knew he would have had her dancing without it. Beast Boy was forever surprising her with things like that, like dancing without music, at least, no music that anyone else could hear.

The song was a lullaby, one of the few things her mother had done for her as a young child that mothers generally do, she'd hummed to her, just a wordless little ditty with a generic little tune, but as a child Raven had loved it. She had never really been allowed to listen to music growing up, it was too capable of creating emotion in the listener. That ditty was all she had know before she claimed control and took herself to Earth.

And now she was singing it, this sacred piece of her childhood, and she was humming it as background music for a dancing lesson with Beast Boy. In a way it seemed ironically appropriate that she should share it with him, he had shared his parents memory with her and even if he didn't know it, she was sharing her mothers memory with him too.

Love and Hate indeed.

Beast Boy had loved his parents, like he said, and they had loved him.

Her father hated her; her mother begrudged her at best and feared her at worst, and her feelings towards them were equally mutual.

And yet he was right, what she felt now having lost them both, was exactly what he after his own loss.

Love and Hate, she had often heard and read, were so similar they could often be mistaken for the other. She could never love her father, she respected her mother if nothing else, and understood the reasons behind her lifelong abandonment to the monks of Azar. But the two were similar, Love and Hate.

She use to think she hated the titans, she use to hate all people when she first came to earth, but as she got to know them that changed. One conversation was all it took to change her mind. She had joked once that it took her a month to stop hating Beast Boy, but maybe she never hated him at all…

It was his smile that had done, she decided, when she first met him, he was the only one that didn't greet them all with suspicion or caution. Every fibre of his being was sincere, every smile meant, his heart on his sleeve like an open book for any who could read the writing. He wanted to be her friend, from the very beginning.

And there she had been, dark, brooding, closed off and desperate to fight the destiny that grew within her, desperate to stay connected without getting attached. She hadn't wanted friends, she'd only wanted to do something to prove that it was worth waking up in the morning, she didn't want to be a hero, a leader, but being part of team would allow her to do good, to be good, without being noticed or taking center stage. This was what she wanted, until the very end.

Then the end came and went and she had survived, a lucky penny on her windowsill proved this to her every morning, gleaming with a copper light as the sun kissed it with the dawn.

And there he was still, smiling sincerely, with his heart on his sleeve, just wanting to be her friend...

But where did she now stand?

Raven blinked, suddenly aware of the lack of movement she was doing, at the warmth of Beast Boys body against her own, the subtle heart beat in his chest. When did they get so close? She stopped humming, stopped moving completely, Beast Boy did as well and stood back, aware of her sudden discomfort.

"You're natural Rae." He said, smiling at her in the way he always did, his voice calm and casual, trying to put her at ease. "I'll teach you something else tomorrow, tonight just have a good sleep."

She thought for a moment that he might kiss her hand; he seemed averse for a moment to letting it go, but he did, unkissed smiled again and shifted into a hawk before flying off into the inky velvet sky, lazily circling the tower once, twice, before altering his course for what she knew to be his open bedroom window.

Raven, for once of only a handful of moments in her life, didn't know what to think about what had just happened, so lacking any other idea she did as she was told and simply went to bed.

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Shift here!

Die hard BB-Rae fan, just so you know, and yeah I had a 4 -5 page essay to write (single spaced) so what better task to occupy myself with then writing a seven page beginning-of-fluff-story fanfic about the teen titans? The correct answer is, there is no, so though I might now fail this course I have hopefully at least brought some entertainment to some people out there scattered throughout cyber-space. And that makes it all worthwhile.

So here's the drill.

Likes?

Dislikes?

Review!


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